Spring Planting

The weather is nice and what better activity to do with young children than to take them out to plant and show them first hand where some of our food comes from?

I try and make a point to plant the kinds of things the kids like to eat.



This meant that for the boys, we chose strawberries and a blueberry plant.

For the girl in my new family, we chose cherry tomatoes (she loooooves them).

This makes kids excited, too. They love growing their own food, and eating the food that they grow.

They love learning what it takes to be responsible for the growth, and the pride I see in their eyes as they take on this task is like no other.

It's one of the biggest proofs that work does indeed create pride in accomplishment!

Things are About to Start Hopping

It's been awhile, I know.

The job with the family I have been with for a few years is coming to an end in a few weeks. The family has never needed summer care, and next year the boys will be in school full time. Over the last 6 months, my schedule has basically consisted of one or two days a week, so I continued to look for a position where I could supplement the rest of the week and hopefully end up with a long term position after this current one ended. I knew the ending was coming this year, so have been looking since the Fall.

I have been in contact with a few families, but usually for one reason or another, things just didn't match up exactly. I am flexible in many, many ways. However, I know what I am worth and, unfortunately, there are many parents who seem to expect private, tailored, in-home care (and general house management, as it seems many of them want) should be cheaper than putting their child in institutional child care centers. The condescension I see in some advertisements have me appalled sometimes. They act like you're just gonna sit on the couch and text all day while the child runs around in poopy pants and tears up the house.

I mean, yes I sit down sometimes. I need to. Don't YOU get a break at work?

I know many other nannies get cheesed off at this attitude too. A parent makes it clear that your work in their home is not even worth minimum wage. They expect a pseudo-parent, housekeeper, laundress, teacher, chauffeur and cook then want to claim the measly wage they grudgingly cough up as a deduction, making you earn even less while jipping you of your working rights.

No thanks. I will work in a day care before becoming your house slave.

Anyhoo, the point of that little side rant is that it took several months to finally find someone who matched what I know I want in a job. Luckily, I can be picky and wait for what I want. And it finally came along.

The job is a....well, a combination of mother's helper/house manager/nanny. Mom does not work, but is very involved in many community businesses and boards. So she is gone often, but sometimes home. So far (and it's only been a few months) everyone, including the grandparents who often come by, seem to be totally laid back and open to letting me do things in the way I see fit. There is no micro-managing. The grandmother has told me more than once, 'just go ahead and take over. That's what they want.' (Meaning, house decisions).

There are so many good things about this job so far. It pays well more than the average pay for our area. I am not (so far) being micro managed and am encouraged to make the decisions on outings, activities and dinner. If I mention I wanna make something special, she is like, "Sure!" and leaves her credit card. They are just starting their family (one child so far who is 2, but twins on the way and plans for more kids), so that means probable long term.

And, the schedule is super flexible. Right now, we go week by week with scheduling. Mom asks me what I have for the following couple of weeks that I need, and then she schedules her own appointments around it.

So far, I feel so very lucky.

Dinner Woes

You know what I really don't like about my job?

Dinner.

Actually, I like to cook. And I normally don't mind dinner.

Except......

What I really dislike is trying to figure out what meal to make with what is in the house. It throws me off, all the time. I may have an idea, but be missing one or two ingredients. Or find a side dish that goes really well with it would be impossible to make based on what is in the cupboard. And the fact that making a grocery list, or planning a menu, or going to the grocery is not part of my job makes it even more difficult. I almost wish I had that extra chore, so I could plan a menu and make out a list for what is needed.

At the very beginning, I actually did do that. Plan ahead, I mean, and then give MomBoss a list of what ingredients I would need in the house to make that happen. And MomBoss was pretty good about making sure I had it, but I sometimes got the feeling she wasn't always super thrilled with my planned meal if it was out of the norm of what she usually bought.

A few times I bought ingredients because I wanted to try out a recipe.

Then sometimes MomBoss would leave a note saying, "I was thinking Lasagna tonight", or something of the sort, with a recipe card out along with it. And actually, I liked that. It gave me direction. Not that I need direction, per se. But when I have no hand in really planning a grocery list or menu, and have to rummage through the fridge or pantry trying to put together a meal, it gets frustrating. I'd like to plan and know what to expect.

I am currently interviewing for another job to add more hours to my current one, since the boys are now in preschool and I am not needed as much. The next family has an almost two year old, and a set of twins on the way. Mom actually wants errands and meal prep in addition to childcare.

I think what I am going to propose is this:

I will plan out a weekly, bi weekly, or monthly menu and submit it to MomBoss for approval (until I get a feel for who likes what). When it is approved, I will make out a grocery list and buy what I need to make the meals.

I will feel so much more accomplished that way!

Job Searching Tales Continued

I thought I had a bite!

It was interesting, really. I applied for a long term position with a schedule that sounded workable for me. However, after playing e-mail and phone tag due to a busy Memorial Day weekend for my family and the potential employer family, the prospective MB and I finally got on the phone together.

She explained their needs and we had a long conversation about expectations and a possible meeting date.

Then came the question: what was my rate?

Really? It was clearly posted.

So I tell her. It's two kids, one a toddler. It includes driving around and taking the kids places, which is very cool. I love a parent who gives me free reign on outings.

She insisted on paying $2 below the low end of the going rate in our area. She felt like I was a great match, but they were unwilling to go up $2 an hour from their anticipated pay rate.

No go.

I had a man contact me about a position in his home for his children. I asked the normal questions, what were the duties and hours and days needed?

I truly do not understand people. I mean, really. You want private care and you want to pay less than daycare rates.

He told me their family's expectations. Early morning, get older kids ready for school, fix breakfast for all, transport to school.

No biggie.

Take baby to scheduled classes, like music. Do educational activities with baby. Pick up child who goes to school half day, fix lunch, put kids down for naps, do laundry, change all beds, sweep, vacuum. Get kids up, pick up older child from school come home, help with homework, start dinner, play with kids (no tv). Some grocery errands as needed.

Possible that some nights I would need to stay to put kids to bed, in which case I would be responsible for baths and making sure backpacks and lunches were in order for the next day for the school aged kids.

Pay? $200-$250 a week. Oh, and no gas reimbursement for trips unless I drove more than 10 miles in a single trip.

Never mind that I could easily go over 10 miles a day in all the little single trips combined together.

Oh, and they had a dog who was their 'baby' before their kids came along. Any nanny taking the job would need to be willing to treat DOG as the first child and given as much attention as the kids so she didn't feel left out.

YES. I SWEAR TO YOU. The DOG!

What do you think I said to THAT fine offer?

Job Seeking

Wow, has it really been months since I last updated?

A lot going on in my nanny world! I am officially looking for employment again. the family I worked for won't need me again until Fall, and even then my hours will be way down from before because both boys will be in school most of the week. I've told former MB that if I find a job that allows me to work the one day a week they will need me, that I will do so. But in the meantime, I am looking for more full time work.

I was planning to just take the summer off, and am looking for jobs that have start dates for mid August or Fall. I can afford to do that, as my husband is the main wage earner and we can live quite comfortably on his income alone. However, I came across a job 2 weeks ago that was too good to pass up, that had a start date of immediately, so I applied and interviewed for this job.

The funny thing is, this couple ended up taking a much, much cheaper option of in home daycare. These were people offering between $32000 - $38000 a year for a nanny working 25-40 hours! When we got into the discussion about what is required tax-wise, etc, this corporate executive mother got very confused. Seriously, she abandoned a private nanny over the issue of employer taxes for an unlicensed in-home center that is now costing her probably about $4000 a year?!??!!

My mind is boggled.

But nevermind that......

This has lent me to now kick around the idea of actively seeking for summer, altho I am still not certain I wanna work during summer. The hours and pay would just have to be right, and I am lucky enough to be picky and wait.

Another note: I had a woman pursuing me on a care site, and the hours sounded good. The start date was mid-August, also good. So, in interest, I sent back a reply to this woman's request asking for more details, including that of her pay.

She wrote back giving me all the details I had asked for, except the one about pay.

Now, I am not trying to be a biddy. But with gas prices the way they are, I don't see any need to waste anyone's time on setting up interviews and getting hopes up when something that is a deal breaker can be noted upfront. I am efficient like that, and I admit not everyone appreciates it! When initially corresponding, I make certain the hours, days and pay specifically match up between us or I see no sense in wasting anyone's time. I've been tangled up with too many parents who say things to get me 'in', only to switch the game around to something I very clearly do not want. Like with the Indian couple who pursued me and said they would be flexible and all when I stated that it didn't seem the hours they needed a nanny matched what I wanted in a schedule. Once they got me 'in' tho.....they changed all of that, Added on hours and lessened pay.

Ummmm.....no.

IMO, all of that can be avoided. I believe in communicating clearly. In the case of this mother who didn't answer my question, I wrote her back again and told her everything she said sounded good. However, my minimum charge was X, and that was solely for the care of the baby and the cleaning associated only with my being there (meaning I clean up the messes baby and I made while there). If she wanted extra housework, laundry, etc, the charge would be more. I asked her, was this within her range?

I never heard back. Oh well.

Another family, just a few weeks ago, also started pursuing me. I asked the father (who contacted me) for details. Days, hours? He simply said, "8 hours a day 5 days a week"

Well, THAT told me NOTHING. Not to mention, my former family knew of this family and sorta gave the advice to steer clear of them. So I did not write this guy back when he clearly did not answer my question for details.

He then wrote again. I told him it didn't appear as if my needs matched what they needed.

So then he had his wife email me. She was a tad more sociable, it seemed. I basically told her 'no'.

But then I changed my mind, and they had already found someone else!! LOL

Oh well again.

So, anyway, that is my update. I'll keep ya posted on the interesting stories as they happen!

Valentine's Day!

Life has been busy, both in the job and outside the job! I haven't had much time to update!

What we're doing today? The sun is out (finally) and the weather may be slightly decent. Besides going out and soaking in some much needed rays, we plan to cook today! Here is one of our cooking projects - http://familyfun.go.com/recipes/heart-tarts-975751/

And for Momma, the boys and I are going to make some chocolate covered strawberries to go with their handmade cards. So, busy day planned!!!

Happy Valentines Day to everyone! I'd be interested in what fun you have planned for your charges!

Just a Job?

It's tough out there.

Hubby and I were talking about the competition in the nanny field vs years ago, before the internet. Sure, you could go through an agency or newspaper ad, but you couldn't just daily browse ads with ease and 'shop around', so to speak, as you can easily do today. I would imagine for parents that it is exceedingly frightening to know the nanny you love could up and leave at any moment because she found something that pays better, is closer, or has a better schedule/duties for the money. (on the same note, maybe many don't really care.) 

Not all nannies are looking for 'something better', so to speak. Sometimes, jobs will fall in their laps because a parent looking will see a profile.

The parents, of course, have a plethora of nannies to choose from. But they have an extra burden, one that nannies carry as well but not to the degree, and with the same implications, as parents do. It's the finding someone with whom your children will be safe. Someone who will not neglect your children, or treat them badly.


This is the problem, I think, with simply seeing your nanny job as a means to an end, or as strictly a business relationship. (or, from the parents' end, simply seeing your nanny as a common house servant). Dadboss and I had this discussion just last week. I was telling him that I have seen some nannies who seem to merely view their position as a 'job'. Oh, they may do their 'job' well. But it's just that - a job. And the relationship with the family, or at least the parents, is pretty impersonal and businesslike. I believe that, of course, there is a business aspect to the relationship that is just that. However, one must find a balance between the business and the personal. For what I am doing as a nanny, I believe, is very personal. I am caring for someone's child, basically replacing the parent-position when they are not home. I am in their house, taking care of it on a daily basis, cooking their meals. There is a vast level of personalness there. It goes beyond just doing my job, and doing it well.

Maybe some parents want that, the businesslike relationship with no personal interest in their nanny as an individual, or as an important influence on the children and therefore the family itself. Seen only for the job she does and nothing more. Maybe some nannies are comfortable with that. I am not one in either category who would want that, as an family-service employee or as one who might hire a care giver for my own children. As a parent, I want whoever is caring for my children to actually care, as well as be skilled. And caring for the children that one nannies involves caring for the family from which the children come.

I read sometime ago someone say that nannies who think that families actually care about them are fooling themselves. They will cut you if needed, and won't think twice.

This is true in most cases. I don't fully agree that all families would not think twice, but bottom line is, people must make decisions in their life and sometimes those decisions are tough to make when times require it. This does not necessarily mean that the families do not care at all.

I mean, I love the kids I care for, and I adore the family. I go over and beyond for them in many ways, and they reciprocate that as well. I do things like that because I want to, because I do care how it impacts them. They do things for me over and beyond for the same reason, because they greatly appreciate me.

But if I ever had a choice to make involving the well being of my own children and family, then I would have to choose my family's well being. If there was a schedule change with my husband, or we had to move.......I would have no choice. It would be very hard, and I would be very concerned about the impact on my bosses and charges, and I would do all I could to help make the transition as easy as I could until they found a replacement -- but only as I was able.

Why are parents expected to do any less?

Yes, some do not care much. Just as there are some nannies who really do not care all that much either.